


Come Back

by generic_epiphany



Category: Victorious (TV)
Genre: Angst, College, F/M, Getting Back Together, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-08
Updated: 2019-12-08
Packaged: 2021-02-25 21:13:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,420
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21712021
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/generic_epiphany/pseuds/generic_epiphany
Summary: “I hear you like to hit girls.”“Man, if you met her, you’d understand.”That was the real root of his heartache, wasn’t it? He knew her. She had been his first love—the one that cast a shadow so long and dark that no one else compared. She was a queen, a tyrant, a force of nature. How had none of these idiots seen it? How had they thought she was something they could break?
Relationships: Beck Oliver/Jade West
Comments: 10
Kudos: 258





	Come Back

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first Victorious fic! Hope someone else enjoys it! <3

He’d been away for a while, working on a project with some friends. Every time he came back to school, whether it had been high school before or film and arts college now—he always found himself looking for her. They barely even talked anymore—hadn’t dated in years. But they shared friends and had made peace. Still, he was never home until he laid eyes on her. Then he could relax. Of course, he never said anything about that to anyone. He hadn’t even noticed it himself until this last semester. He had dated a handful of girls but it never lasted. Some had been really nice, but then they were too nice, never wanting to make decisions and always letting him decide everything. Bottling their thoughts and feelings until it became a silent chasm between them, killing any possibility of a real relationship. Others flamed out fast—big temper girls but never his girl. The last one had cheated on him. The worst part had been that it hadn’t even hurt. He’d been kind of relieved for an excuse to end things.

Beck walked into the long main hallway of the university and spotted Jade almost immediately. His shoulder relaxed. Home. Fuck. He needed to deal with this. Maybe he should talk to her. They could be friends—more than just casually hanging out at the same parties and places with the rest of the group.

He started toward her this time—not just walking by like they were strangers without their friends around. And then she looked up, some of that dark hair sliding back, and he almost lost his step. Her lip was busted and bruised and another dark splotch ringed in red swollen skin decorated her cheek, clinging to her cheekbone and under her eye. What was worst, was how she looked at him like normal, surprise and a bit of distance. Her eyebrow raised and he exhaled relief, stopping in front of her. “You let the cosmetic girls play with your face again?” Last time they’d made her a zombie.

Jade stared at him for a long, confused, second before she smiled. The smile was short, turning into a subtle wince when it pulled at her lip.

His smile vanished with hers, eyes widening.

“No, this one is real. But I’ll let them know you thought it was their work. They’ll love that,” she said, her voice tired but still hers. “Did you need something?” There it was. The distance and dismissal. Not unkind but not welcoming—that’s what they’d become.

“What? No, nothing. What happened?” He started to reach for her.

She slapped his hand away and looked at him funny, like he was the one acting weird. She was the one acting like this was totally normal. “I broke up with my boyfriend,” she said bluntly and even threw in a shrug but he caught another wince before she could press it back.

He took a step back, looking at her fully, like maybe he’d be able to see through all those black layers. His mind couldn’t catch up to this. No. Who the hell would lay hands on Jade? Who was she even dating now? No. No. No. Jade was a goddess, the fiery, vengeful kind. She didn’t get hit by boyfriends. “Jade—”

“Stop looking so worried,” she snapped, forcing a laugh and walking around him. She was carrying herself carefully. “It’s not like I’m still dating him and you know I didn’t go down without kicking back.”

He turned around, staring when she walked away from him. She was so casual about it. Like it had happened before. “What does that mean?” Beck asked, following her, using his calm voice. Yelling wouldn’t get anywhere with her. 

She looked surprised that he’d followed, confused even, but she kept walking. “What?” She groaned and shook her head. “You don’t need to act like you care. No one’s even around and Tori already knows.” She laughed then, that wicked sound he loved. “She thought I should call in sick or at least put makeup over it. Fuck that. No one stops me.”

God, he still loved her. “Jade, wait.” She was almost to her next class. “It’s not an act. You know I care about you—”

She turned suddenly and he almost had to jerk back to keep from running into her. “No. I don’t. And what? You saw my face and thought I’d be a damsel for you to rescue? Decided to swoop in?” Her eyes narrowed, looking him over. “You’re not that kind of guy, Beck. You’re better than that.”

He stood there and watched her storm off into her next class. For what felt like long minutes he stood there, mind racing, trying to think of what to do and not think about everything he’d messed up. If they had been better friends after the breakup. If they’d just not broken up…

Tori. Tori knew. He ran down the hall and around a corner.

He had to wait outside her dance class and when she came out she looked surprised to see him. She smiled, despite looking stressed. “Hey, Beck! You’re home—”

“Who is he?” It was the first question to leap from his mouth. Not the most important question, but the first.

Tori blinked at him. “Huh?”

“I saw Jade.”

Tori actually rolled her eyes, groaning and leaning against the wall. “She really knows how to pick them.”

It felt like she’d sucker punched him and he wished he’d been the one leaning against something. “This has happened before?”

She shrugged, uncomfortable. “Why do you care?”

How could they think he wouldn’t? He stared.

“Twice before, I think,” she dropped her voice, glancing around to make sure no one was listening as she spoke. “There was that guy, Robert? In high school. He got handsy and when she told him to get lost he slapped her. But then she punched him. That was the end of that. And then Greg…” she said the name with disdain. He remembered Greg. First year of college. The guy was quiet, goth, in a band or something. “They fought a lot, you know how she is…” He didn’t like how that sounded, like it made sense that someone would abuse Jade. Like she had it coming. “It started off just being these things he’d say to her. Mean shit. I mean, they dated for almost the whole year. He was always wearing her down in these weird ways. She told me, after, that it had started with him grabbing her too hard and pushing and she hadn’t realized it was that bad until that night he beat the shit out of her,” Tori said it like he knew about it—like everyone knew about it!

“What?” he tried not to yell, tried to keep his voice even.

She blinked and then frowned. “Oh. I guess you were out of the country then… Yeah. I mean, it scared the shit out of me. I came back to the dorm room and she was all messed up. Greg was at the hospital because she’d cut him with some scissors and then after that he left the school. And Tyler—”

Tyler. That was the current boyfriend. He remembered him. He knew him. They lived in the same dorm building.

“They fight a lot. Was just shoving and yelling before. She said they broke up though,” Tori said, nodding like that was good enough. “She never gets back together with them after they hit her so I guess it’s okay… I mean, not okay, but… I don’t know. You know how Jade is. She’s hard. She’ll be okay.” Someone down the hall was waving at her and Tori jumped up from the wall. “I’m late. I gotta go… But, seriously, don’t worry about it, Beck. She’s got it and I’m always here for her.” She patted his arm and then ran off, those eyes pleading with him to let it go and not worry, like she was worried it would ruin his day. Like it shouldn’t.

Beck didn’t even plan to go to the guy’s dorm room. He certainly wasn’t going to his classes.

He knocked on the door, wondering if he was even in there and what was his plan if he was? What did he want to say?

It wasn’t until the door opened and he saw Tyler that he knew why he’d gone here. It wasn’t to talk to him. It was to see him. He opened the door and leaned out, eyebrow arched. “Yeah?”

He was pretty and tall and at least three times her weight. Shoulders and muscle. His knuckles were red from where he’d used them on Jade. And there was a bruise next to his right eye and a long scratch on his cheek, not to mention the bandage on his left arm. Maybe she’d used her scissors this time too? It was a strange sort of relief, to see what damage she’d managed to do. She always pushed back. She always hit back. “I hear you like to hit girls.”

Tyler laughed but it was thin and tired. “Man, if you met her, you’d understand.”

That was the real root of his heartache, wasn’t it? He knew her. She had been his first love—the one that cast a shadow so long and dark that no one else compared. She was a queen, a tyrant, a force of nature. How had none of these idiots seen it? How had they thought she was something they could break?

He swung before he thought, knocking the guy back and on his ass. He clicked his teeth, resisting the urge to step over the threshold and keep hitting. He forced himself to walk away, to keep walking until he was outside and could breathe again. 

* * *

It was a long day and everyone thought they had the right to ask about her bruised face. She didn’t answer most of them. She wasn’t ashamed. She hadn’t done anything wrong. But that didn’t mean she had to talk to these idiots. She was sore and her pride hurt even more than the bruises. What an asshole. Her phone buzzed when she was almost back to the dorm building. Tori was staying out tonight. Going to a party. Asked if she wanted to join or if she wanted her to come back anyway. Jade rolled her eyes and replied, “Don’t come back. I’m locking the door.” And then a string of confusing emojis to keep Tori busy for a while.

She turned the corner into her hallway and almost stopped walking when she saw Beck there, leaning against the wall across from her door. Was he waiting for someone else? No. He was probably still upset about her face. She hadn’t expected him to care, but it made sense when she thought about it. He was a good person and they had friends in common, even if he didn’t like her anymore. She walked closer slowly. “Okay, hero, I get it, you’re good, you can go now.” She wanted him to go—needed him to go—because no matter how many years there were between their childhood romance, she still missed him. Being around him still hurt.

He stood straight, stepping away from the wall. He hesitated, like he might just leave like she said. “Can we talk?” he asked instead.  
If he was anyone else she would have either groaned loudly or just said, “No.” But he wasn’t anyone else. He was Beck. The Beck. Her Beck. “About what?” she asked, like it could be anything but her messed up face.

“Us.”

She stopped where she was, almost dropping her phone. She felt tears in her eyes, shocking her. They hadn’t been an “us” in years. Not since high school. She swallowed hard, against a stone of hope and pain in her throat. “No. Don’t do that.”

“I know the timing is shitty and—”

“You think you need to date me to keep me from dating assholes? Is that it? Some kind of obligation?” she snapped. “Or like a cover to keep Tyler from coming back? He’s not coming back. I handled it.”

He shook his head, those eyes imploring her the way they used to. “No. It’s not about that. I miss—”

“Stop!” she almost shrieked, jerking back a step. But she had nowhere to go. She had to go forward to get to her dorm room. He was saying the things she would have dreamed of him saying but it wasn’t right—it wasn’t real. “You dumped me—”

“We broke up,” he clarified, the way he always did when she said that. They had broken up because they couldn’t communicate. She knew it, but could never shake the feeling that he’d called it—he’d ended them. When she had broken up with him, it had always been bluster and her hurt pride or fear. When he did it, it was real. Maybe they’d been too young then? No. She couldn’t think like that. He had broken up with her and he had been right to. She got to be angry about it, but it was the only relationship she ever had that didn’t go violent. And yet it was the one that hurt the most. “Please, Jade, I just want to talk.”

She mustered the courage to put on a mean face and march toward him and her dorm room door. She wanted him to back up, the way other people did when she walked toward them like that, but he didn’t. Beck had never been afraid of her. “I’m tired,” she snapped.

He looked like he might argue but then he just bit his lip and nodded, looking at the floor. “Okay.”

She got the door unlocked and closed her eyes, dragging a breath and hating the way his pain still rippled through her. “Lunch tomorrow. Cafe on the corner,” she said before going in and closing the door. Maybe he’d stand her up. Then she could be mad at him. She liked being mad. It was a feeling she understood—one that didn’t make her feel helpless and lost.

She locked the door and dropped her bag on the floor, peeling off her hoodie and going to the mirror to stare at herself. Tyler had done a number on her. Her shoulder and right arm really hurt, his hand print here and there, lost in the mess of bruises growing darker and darker. She hated how easily he’d been able to throw her around, grabbing and lifting and pinning like she was a doll. She’d kicked him good though, elbowed him in the face and even scratched him too. One of her exes had been right about her, there was just something about her that drove people violent. She was loud and pushy and crazy. She could probably drive a saint to lose it. Jade wasn’t going to absolve these assholes of their crimes, but she couldn’t ignore the truth—she attracted certain guys. No one would want to date her unless they were the kind of asshole hoping to break her. That’s why she knew Beck was just playing the good friend or feeling obligated to take care of her. He was too good for this. He wouldn’t be like those guys, so he wouldn’t date her. He couldn’t.

Jade crawled into her bed, still in her boots and tights, and pulled the covers over her head. Fuck the world. She was going to sleep the rest of the day and fight again tomorrow. Hopefully he’d stand her up. Please, let him stand her up.

* * *

Beck thought he’d gotten to the cafe early but she was already there, sitting outside at a table with a coffee and her laptop. He didn’t miss the surprise on her face when she saw him walking over—like she hadn’t thought he’d come. Had she forgotten she invited him? He would have usually asked if he could sit—maybe give her an option to blow him off—but he was too afraid she really would. So he sat down across from her at the little table. “Hi.”

“Hi.”

The bruises looked worse today, but not as swollen.

She sat up straighter, brow pinching. “What happened to your hand?” she asked, actually worried.

Beck almost laughed because his bruised knuckles were nothing compared to the image she was presenting. And then he saw her expression change, like she realized what those bruises were from and her whole body tensed, leaning back in her chair and looking at him like a stranger—a stranger she wasn’t sure she wanted to know.

“Hit someone?” Jade asked, voice low.

He still knew her so well that for a second it blew him away, watching it all play across her features. She was afraid he was violent. Him? And like she’d been a pacifist herself? “Only someone bigger than me who hurt someone I care about.”

She stared, like she was going to read the lie in his eyes but it wasn’t there. It was never there. She flushed and looked away. “You wanted to talk. You got questions or something? Want to hear me say it won’t happen again and I learned my lesson?”

Beck leaned back in his seat, studying her. “What the hell would you need to learn? You dated someone and he hurt you.” She’d broken up with him, and according to Tori she always did when things got out of hand. “Has it happened before?” he asked, knowing the answer. This wasn’t what he’d come to talk about, but he would be an idiot to pass up any opportunity Jade offered to give information. He could have this conversation today. He could save the others for another day because he had every intention of making other days. He’d messed this up before, walked away because he didn’t know how to make things work or see where they were going. He was older now. He knew that they didn’t need to know what would happen next, as long as they could be with someone they loved and trusted. And there was no one he’d ever loved or trusted more than her.

Jade shrugged but it was careful and he wondered again how the rest of her looked. Had she been to a doctor? “With Tyler? No. I mean. He never swung at me before.” Another shrug and she picked up her coffee, holding it in both hands, the long sleeves of her sweater past her knuckles.

Beck raised an eyebrow. “What does that mean?”

“What do you want?”

“I want to be in your life again.”

She laughed—the mean, fuck you, laugh. “Why? Does this do it for you?” She gestured to her face. “If I’d known bruises turned you on—”

“Knock it off,” he said, voice gentle though. This was about her pain not his pride. “I missed you. I was looking for you yesterday when I saw…this.”

She snorted, unconvinced, and looked away.

“If you don’t want to date right now, I get it. But we could hang out, be friends?”

She drank her coffee, trying to look bored but he could see her thinking about it. Thank God, she missed him. He could read it on her, just like he had in the hallway yesterday. “We were never friends,” she muttered.

He wanted to argue that. Yeah, they’d jumped into being a couple, but they had still been great friends. He knew her and she knew him. “We could be now. I’m pretty cool. You’d like me.”

She bit her lip, thinking.

He leaned forward, resisting the urge to tell her to stop, afraid she’d tear the little scab on her lip with her teeth.

“Whatever,” Jade said, and they were friends.

* * *

He spent weeks being friends and it was shockingly easy. They really did fit with each other. He touched her arm on week two and she didn’t slap his hand away or yell at him. He pushed her hair behind her ear on week three. She smiled at him on week four, like she was happy to see him, and went straight into telling him some funny shit that happened in her cinematography class. He fucked it up on week five, at a party, when he kissed her. She looked at him like a stranger again—like she had when she saw the bruises on his knuckles. She looked like he’d betrayed her and then she bolted.

Beck chased her all the way back to her dorm, catching up to her in the narrow hallway. She was alarmingly fast. “Jade, hang on.”

She had her door unlocked, swinging around to glare daggers at him down the hall. It didn’t stop him from walking closer though. “No! You’re not like that!”

He blinked, confused. “What? Not like what?” He almost laughed but didn’t. “Not into women? You do know we’ve made out before right?”

She shook her head angrily, flinging her door open.

He hurried to catch up before it slammed and locked automatically, following her into her dorm. He had been there before, but only with Tori to pick up books or something. “Just tell me what you mean. I’m pretty sure you’re interested in me… But if I read you wrong then I’m sorry—”

“Shut up!” Jade yelled. There were tears in her eyes and it felt like he’d been kicked in the chest. “You were the good one!”

“Jade,” he had no idea what she was talking about now but he hated to see her this exposed.

“You dumped me—”

“We broke up…”

“Good guys do not date me, Beck. You know how I am—”

“Why the fuck do people keep saying that like it means something?” he said, taking a step closer. She didn’t back away, staring back at him like he was an idiot and it was right in front of him. “I know a couple guys you’ve dated have been abusive—”

“All of them.”

He stared at her, forgetting to breathe. No. That couldn’t be true. He’d met some of her boyfriends before. None of her relationships lasted long but…

“All of them,” she ground out again. “But you.”

He took a step back and leaned against the closed door.

“I’m just the kind of girl guys want to hit,” she said it like a joke but it didn’t take the tears from her eyes. And he could tell someone had said it to her, probably one of her exes. “I get it. I’m mean and I’m loud and I won’t do what I’m told. But I won’t let someone push me around either, so these are my relationships. But that wasn’t us. You weren’t that kind of guy. You dumped me you didn’t…”

She trailed, choking on the words, and looking away. One of her hands pushed against her face. It had healed but that didn’t mean she had.

Beck came closer, slowly, so he was sure she’d see him coming and he was sure he’d see if she tensed or looked scared. She didn’t. Of course, she didn’t. His Jade was never scared, not even when she had been fighting with monsters. His heart hurt. “You think every guy that likes you, will end up hitting you?” he said it softly, but clearly. Her head bobbed in a nod but before she could say anything—before she could start telling him how it was because of her temper or her attitude, he continued, “You think if I like you… If I date you, that I’ll hit you?” It hurt everything in him to say it, but he wasn’t afraid of hurting. He was afraid of regretting letting her go again.

She shook her head slowly. “You’re not that kind of guy.” And then quieter, one of those tears spilling over. “I don’t want to make you that guy.”

He exhaled slowly. “You are fire,” he explained. “You are a tempest. A valkyrie. A fucking queen.” He took another step to her, until his hand could curl around hers, turning her toward him. “And I have loved you since we were kids. You have made me more frustrated and angry than I think I’ve ever been with anyone else.” He saw how she winced at that, trying to harden her heart and steel her features. He squeezed her hand gently. “And I have never wanted to hurt you. You’re not going to make me into a bad person. You’re going to make me whole.”

“You can’t know…”

“That I won’t hit you? Yes, I can, Jade,” he said, touching her cheek gently, where the bruise had been still yellow a couple weeks ago. “Your strength doesn’t upset me or threaten me. I’m not scared of you. And I’ve always liked how you argue and nag and twist things around. But even if none of that was true, I know who I am—just like you know who I am—and it’s not that guy.” She wasn’t afraid to be with him because of some fear of getting abused again—it was the fear of him being the one that did it. Of ruining them. He knew then that she still loved him, that her heart cherished some memory of him. His Jade could withstand anything and anyone. She had walked to class with a busted lip and bruised face like it was nothing to her. But if he was a monster…that would hurt more than bruises and a wrecked relationship. That would be heartbreaking. Luckily, Beck knew he would never fail her in this. It wouldn’t even be hard. He had never even imagined hurting her. It just wasn’t in him.

Her hand touched his chest, fingers curling against his shirt and he exhaled relief. He thumbed away the second tear that fell from her eye.

“Don’t lie. Don’t hit,” she said, voice growing steady with every word.

Beck smiled softly. “Don’t hide. Don’t run away.”

She had both hands in the front of his shirt now, turned toward him fully, studying something in his eyes. “I’m difficult.”

“So am I.”

“I know,” she said, head tipping up.

“I know,” he said back and leaned down, kissing her. This time she didn’t look at him like he’d broken some unspoken rule and take off. This time she kissed him back, and it was just as passionate and world-ending as he remembered.


End file.
